Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Sweet surrender...


It was a boring Wednesday morning when the clouds suddenly dimmed upon her. She sat cross-legged hearing voices she knew for the 24th year of her life... The voices cascades bouncing from one room to the other which eventually turn into yells... She murmurs deep within, this is just the life she will be living for the rest of her life or until she does something about it... A roof on her head, a bachelor degree, a stable job and a penniless pocket. Somehow she is not satisfied... Breakfasts seem quite heavy for her to digest since it is accompanied by rants about the bills yet unending spendrift on facials and wants... Later perhaps she'll just sit and stare and listen some more.. Or if she's lucky she might stop a flying saucer in midair to avoid it from hitting another face. She wonders if the dream she had last night would someday become a reality but with a 100 peso bill it's far from being one. Her thoughts would seem so shallow for mortals to understand. They are mere mortals anyway, they are far from knowing what lies beyond these cerebral meanderings. She thought, "They'll never understand, just as long as you nod their head in their direction they'll be completely satisfied." Thoughts and opinions are intangible, not enough to fill their filthy guts to put their minds into it.
She stood on the balcony having enough of the petty quarrels she had witnessed. Too much action now for the boring Wednesday she had intended. She lazily looked at the clouds admiring the scenery that once in her life brought her solace. In admiration, her mind started ticking and thoughts of how she'd want her life to be, smelled so close behind her. She could feel the breathe of her dreams creeping behind the back of her ears. She knew it was there but it was hiding all along because she never tried to pry open what is rightfully hers. She is afraid that in letting go of the things that brought her comfort she would be left helpless in the torrents of the clouds above. She was swept in the preponderance of her thoughts. The uplifting thoughts she needed have subsided and she would succumb to the unending depth of wanting but never getting. She has made the decision that she must be one with her dream. So she placed a foot forward, decided that this be the step she needed to bring forth a life that she wanted... Maybe not here but elsewhere... And she began to fly...